The Lesson We Learned From Toni Storm

 Hi Divas! Just a girl home after a long day with my preschoolers who were unusually loud after lunch and before naptime. Good day today, despite the not needed snowstorm on the way to work. It's snowing again (more like flurries as I write this) while this morning's snowfall is slowly melting. I'm starting to think that we will never have spring with winter staying around until Labor Day at this point. 

Talk about the long winter. The only great thing about this time of year is the "spring ahead". Our days are longer with more daylight. I don't know about you, but I feel a renewed sense of energy with longer days and refreshed. There's something about the mix of increased daylight and knowing that summer is almost here that makes me feel more energized. 

Can you lose energy? Yes. Passion? Yes. Does your light dim? Yes. Is it ok for this to happen? Yes. Why does it happen? Who knows. It just does. Professional and personal, it happens to everyone, even yours truly. Toxic friends, relationships, even family members, can drain our energy. Toxic employers, bad work environments, unsupportive bosses and/or bosses who refuse to see they are the problem and they blame you for your lack of passion/drive for your job to cover their failures. It happens more often than you think and people lose friends and lovers, along with employers losing good people.

I left my last position due to the lack of support that I needed which leadership knew that I needed yet had the unrealistic expectation that I could work in said environment without any support. Within this situation, I left like my light was dimming-kind of like a lightbulb that struggles to light up when turned on. This had been on and off for the last four years, then I landed the job I have now. The light bulb is shining in an antique lamp and somedays I feel like I am lighting up the entire center. 

I learned a lesson-it's ok to feel the way I feel and if my light goes out. That doesn't mean anything is wrong with me and that this too shall pass. 

https://twitter.com/cagesideseats/status/1509344966925070336 Cageside Seats posted the aforementioned tweet about Toni Storm leaving WWE, describing the environment as toxic while undervaluing employees. They went on to say that her leaving is a life lesson for all of us. 

Indeed it is. And this is why I defend pro wrestling and the people that portray said characters. Grandma used to tell me they are "laughing all the way to the bank". While this is true, how many of them are laughing or even happy with their employers? How many are happy with WWE if their names are not Becky, Charlotte or Natalya? 

The same goes for the rest of us. How many are us are happy with our employers who put us down or pass us for positions and/or assignments/projects in favor of someone who is a family member or friend, or perhaps someone who is unqualified? What about the toxic environment where there are policies that only apply to a certain group of people? How about the boss that lies to your face and then attempts to cover up the lie with another lie? Then there is the boss who treats you different because you are unique and you are YOU. What kind of environment is that and who wants to be there?

I've been there and I left. Best move I ever made. Toni leaving was best for her career. She did her work in NXT for three years, then came to SD to participate here and there, participated in the women's Five-on-five SS match, and then faced Charlotte on SD for the title. My guess is that she was told they had "nothing" for her because they didn't appreciate her or know what to do with her. 

And then she was gone. Not gone, but gone as in mentally checked out. She asked to be released and was gone. Who can blame her? At my last job, not only did I have a challenging work environment with no support plus a blind eye by leadership, I also had money stolen from my wallet with a simple shrug from my boss. At that point I was mentally checking out, and at some point I knew each passing day I was checking out even more. I liked my boss yet I was unhappy given how I was treated. 

The lesson here is something many of you already know, yet someone of you may not understand. If you are genuinely happy being treated badly or even used in a relationship, or if you want to stay with an employer that undervalues you, that's your choice. Don't stay hoping things will change because they won't. I did that and it was the experience I will always remember. 

With love,

Dani