Happily Broken Hearted

 Greetings Divas! It’s been a month since I’ve last seen you. Settling into working two jobs (I work in education plus I’m expensive too) which has been going better than ever. My second job in customer service/retail is fun, yet overwhelming at the same time, because it’s retail. Decent pay, flexible schedule and I work with great people. So great that I work there and I enjoy it, even my long Tuesdays consisting of both jobs. Other than that, I’ve been busy working, working on myself and living life as a teacher, business owner, kitten mama and wrestling fan. 

As Keke, my best friend of nearly twenty years put it, I’m living my best life, even with a broken heart. I’m happy that I have a broken heart. 

Yes, you read that right. I’m happy that I have a broken heart. 

Today, a co worker asked me to pick up a gift bag and bow for a co workers surprise baby shower. Walking into the dollar store, I spied with my little eyes the clearance Valentine’s Day items. Going into checkout, I spotted Valentine’s Day flowers that were dying when I remembered Valentine’s Day two years ago. That was the day that shouldn’t have existed, largely because I shouldn’t have wasted my time. 

For twenty years, I was the rock, the confidant, the best friend, the protector. And I made mistakes. A mistake that I was never forgiven for by that person, and said person would not let that mistake go. The entire situation was filled with unnecessary drama and much pain while I had blinders on. Several times I had warned this person about how they treated me would come back to them to hit harder than I could. After twenty years of friendship, this person chose not to believe me, but the words of complete strangers, with one of the strangers putting this person’s life in danger. 

It was summer 2021 when this person contacted me after finding out I moved. The entire conversation was sad, pointless to a degree and pathetic, considering it got nowhere. Communication ceased to exist between us and I was upset that I was being ignored. On NYE, this person texted me to wish me a happy new year then went back to ignoring me. 

And I’m happier than ever. Happy that I was able to find the strength to cut this person out of my life and that I saw them for what they really are. Happy that I walked away with my word in tact, accepting the situation for what it is and that it would never change. Happy that I no longer will wonder how much I mean to this person when it’s obvious that I never meant anything. 

I’m free. Free of drama and toxicity. And let me tell you, it feels good to be free. 

With lazy Saturdays and love,

Dani